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The Hard Stuff

July 9, 2023 by Sam Felsing

Dear readers,
Recently, I shared that I was working on a Fall 2023 program called, The Hard Stuff, a one-hour Zoom program that will cover specific topics relating to experiences and feelings around aging and loss.
See readers’ recent comments:

  • Lately, it feels like a short trek from I’m having a lousy day—and, I’m going to die alone.
  • Where to live out your life – Home? Retirement place? With one’s children (if any)?
  • It would be great if we shared our secret box of fear that we all have.
  • A chance to say the words out loud echoing in me? They feel really big; but if you keep them inside, they will isolate you. If you say them out loud, they will connect you.
  • Comforting to hear others and say yes, I feel that way too…
  •  How do others cope with working and juggling to care for the parents/spouse while continuing to work- siblings not stepping in to ‘help’ – leading to frustrations & estrangements
  • Fear or financial insecurities due to health issues – how to pay for everything.

The Hard Stuff is not intended to solve or fix anything. We hope to provide a non-judgmental, open-hearted space to be heard and feel a connection.

Most older adults have experienced considerable loss by the time they reach 65. We’ve lost family and friends, suffered illness and injury. We continue to experience loss more frequently, and support could be helpful. It’s the Hard Stuff we knew was coming.

The Hard Stuff will be moderated by a professional where attendees can call or listen in— topics like estrangements, coping with a difficult diagnosis, anger, disappointments, loss of a partner, or body function.

It reminds me of the once-popular call-in radio programs of days gone by. You could tune in and listen to people debating politics, talk about raising children, etc. You didn’t have to be a caller to participate.

What are your ideas around “The Hard Stuff”—what would you like to see us discuss? If we can share our burdens, maybe they won’t be as heavy or isolating.

Please email me at patti@sfcommunityliving.org and let me know.
Patti Spaniak

Filed Under: People & Stories

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